On Pins and Needles

Living with a Narcissist.

Sophia Bell On Medium
2 min readMay 23, 2024
Photo by Carolina Heza on Unsplash

Gaslighting comes in many ways, shapes and forms.

One form of gaslighting, that’s hardly talked about, is the pins and needles one.


You: “Hey babe, weren't you supposed to be at work today?”

N: “Omg, here we go again!”

You: “What babe?”

N: “Can't you get through one day without asking me a million questions, like wtf.”

You: “I mean, it's just that you work on Tuesdays.”

N: “So fucking what?”

You: “Nothing.”

N: “Why tf are you upset?!”

You: “I'm not.”

N: “I can clearly see you're upset, what's your problem now?”

You: “Nothing.”

N: “Ugh, I can't deal with this, you're such a negative person.”

You: “You're the one yelling.”

N: “Just stop talking to me, I swear, all you ever do is argue, I'm leaving, don't call me.”

And that's that.

You stop asking anything.

And if you stay with the narcissist long enough, you’ll stop talking altogether.

Just gaslit into never saying, asking or criticizing anything about the narcissist ever again.

And gaslit into not being upset over anything, or atleast not expressing it.

So your beloved narcissist can keep abusing you and lying and cheating on you, without you ever asking or saying anything and looking as happy as you can.