Gifts Upset Narcissists

You ever noticed that?

Sophia Bell On Medium
2 min readMar 18


Why is it that narcissists choose to get upset when you buy them something or give them a gift?

It’s never just thank you.

It’s either something along the lines of “It doesn’t fit me and I don’t really like the color.”

Or they’re just straight up displeased.

It makes you wonder why narcissists can’t just show gratitude.

It has to do with the narcissistic relationship dynamic.

Narcissists need to reject, disapprove and not owe you shit.

When you buy a narcissist something, you’ll never get a heartfelt thank you. NEVER.

Narcissists need to reject and disapprove of you, because scarcity increases value.

If the narcissist were to approve of you and be satisfied with your efforts sometimes, you'd stop bending over backwards to please them.

Their approval would drop in value and you'd not want it as much.

It’s basic psychology.

Their knowledge of it, however, isn’t acquired by any study or examination.

It just comes with their innate exploitative character.

Now, about not wanting to owe you anything,

Narcissists can’t express gratitude or appreciation for the mere fact that it weakens their position.

If they were to acknowledge that you did something nice for them, it would mess with the narcissistic relationship equilibrium.

They need for you to always be unworthy and lacking.

To rationalize and justify their behavior.

And that's why they get upset.

You're not to get any credit for anything.

It would mess up the dynamic of you being an asshole,

And the narcissist justifiably hating you.